Home Opinion Satire AVW Newstime Comedy: Student decides if he hasn’t learned it by now, he’s not going to learn it in the next five minutes

AVW Newstime Comedy: Student decides if he hasn’t learned it by now, he’s not going to learn it in the next five minutes

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Last week before his calculus midterm, Sophomore Engineering student Aaron Ellis sat confidently in his seat. Books closed and phone out, Ellis spent the time browsing Facebook while his fellow students desperately tried to cram before the exam.

“I just don’t see the point in studying anymore,” Ellis said. “If I haven’t learned it by now I’m not going to learn it in the next five minutes.”

Students throughout the room had mixed feelings about Aaron’s attitude toward the exam. While some found his demeanor comforting, others felt he was a little too smug for their liking.

“I mean, if he thinks he can solve differential equations using all of the trigonometric identities from memory, then good for him,” commented Jane Filmore, another engineering student. “I, for one, am going to use every chance I get to study.”

“It’s a bold move,” Ellis’s calculus professor said. “This midterm counts for 25 percent of their grade, so I’d think he’d want to be as prepared as possible. But he just sat there. Waiting. I’ve never seen such a thing in all my years of teaching.”

Sources confirm that a little under a minute before the exam, Aaron overheard his classmates discussing a difficult equation, during which he pulled out his book one last time.

“I just wanted to check something real quick,” Aaron answered when asked about the incident.

Still no word on whether Aaron passed or not.

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